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I'd like to blame this on a bunch of assholes, but that's not the case. If my loved ones currently in the digital dating world are any measure, things have gotten no better since I took myself off these sites. But in doing research for a book on sex, I've also learned a lot about the mating habits of our species. My opinion is this: If a same-sex couple is meeting for the first time, one of you should assume full financial responsibility. If you answered yes to any of these, you might need a list of polite questions you can bring along on your dates.

Unless you have another alternative, the adult sex ad sites fill a need and will continue to be around.

Are there any reputable adult dating sites out there (other than the Christian ones which are not my cuppa tea) or is it just a pipe dream?

Tallguy Yeah, but I've yet to find a social networking site that isn't highly restrictive on the kind of photos you may post or on the content of the profile.

I should have stopped responding, but I was physically attracted to him⎯something that didn't happen often. If you don't want hot monkey love with a particular human, you need to communicate that. Now I was being tested on a subject I knew nothing about. If you don't want someone like me, please let your freak flag fly right away.

Prior to that, I spent five years having odd, incomprehensible, maddening, and deeply disheartening encounters like the one with Gary. Sometimes I'd get an email from someone who was exasperated by my own flaky behavior. With no agreed-upon etiquette, all of us did what we could get away with, or we emulated others. Calculating debt based on who had caramel in their frappuccino is not. This habit, I imagine, is due to social anxiety, narcissism, or some combination. If you think you might be a Chatty Cathy or Charlie, here's a test: Do you love the interplay of bass and treble in your own voice? Did you raise your hand in third grade even before the teacher asked anything?

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